Why Perth isn't good with crowds
Dear Baby Boomers. Thank you for your letter and for your questions. It was lovely to hear that you are safe and well and that your irritable bowel syndrome has settled since you started your new diet of eating only money.
I recommend you stick to US dollars.
The dietary value of our Aussie notes has been recently called into question by scientists in that well-respected journal Ways to Make the Most of a Free Education and Soaring Property Values.
Euros are also to be avoided. Vietnamese dong on the other hand can be quite nutritious, although a bit spicy.
As to your question “Is it OK for people to dance at a rock concert when I paid a good main course to enjoy the music from the unobstructed comfort of my backside?”, I’m afraid that the answer is yes it is OK.
Why? Because that is why it is called a rock concert. Yes, even if it is a Sting and Paul Simon concert on the South Perth foreshore.
You may remember rock concerts.
They are those heaving orgies of music, hallucinogens and dancing you went to in the 60s but never inhaled. It is true that they have changed since then. But they are still recognisable by the presence of electric guitars and skinny jeans and continue to be sanctioned rituals where music is played very loud and the people at the front (musicians) are paid to try to make everyone else dance.
No, because you prefer to sit does not mean everyone has to. Yes, even if you gave up lunch to be there. And no, their responding to the music by dancing is not selfish any more than cheering at a football game is selfish.
Crowds, you'll find them at the races.....
This would be different, of course, if they did it in the Senate. That would be inappropriate. Similarly, cheering in the Family Court is generally thought of as being in bad taste.
It is all about time and place.
And yes, actually your rights to the quiet enjoyment of the concert are less important than someone else’s right to interpretive dance — much like my right to a juicy steak with peppered jus doesn’t amount to much if I go to a vegan restaurant.
Time. And place.
But you are not alone in being confused by these things — you are just the ones who call in to talkback radio to complain about it.
For one thing baby boomers are often keen elbow dancers, as I observed in Fremantle last week. I was enjoying a Vietnamese meal with my family at a table that had a view of the street behind Gino’s cafe. A young man with a beard, an electric guitar, skinny jeans and a wooden box that he used for rhythm, was playing up a storm on the corner. Two young women bopped up to him and danced for song after song.
There were smiles and tilts of heads from passers-by and then an older couple walked up. First they watched.
Then the woman turned and gave her purse to her gentleman friend, pulled her dress up a little and started dancing. One of the young women took her by the hands and they danced, twirled away from each other and danced back together.
At this the older man’s back seemed to straighten, his elbows came out, he clicked his fingers (except the ones holding the purse) and entered the fray.
... you'll find them on the train line.....
Old folk can dance. But beyond dancing, Perthlings of all ages are not good in crowds. We arrive at busy places with a quarter-acre block mentality. We are so used to having personal space that we walk, and drive, around with a big fence in our minds.
We get riled in bars where people are standing closer than a metre from us.
“Hey, fella, you looking at my girlfriend’s drink?”
We get all clenched when people get too close. I saw it on the corner of Murray and Barrack streets as The Giants prepared to stroll past a couple of weekends ago.
As The Giants approached, the entire mall began to condense into the strip along Barrack Street. A man in his early 30s was standing in front of me with his white-framed sunglasses, his singlet and his fence. And every time someone tried to move through the crowd near him his face got all gargoyled and he looked at his partner and shook his head.
She twisted her eyebrows and shook her head back.
... you'll find them on the foreshore...
And on the train from Leederville into the city crowds waited for chariots but when the trains arrived it was almost impossible to get on.
It wasn’t that the train was full, not in a London sense of the word, let alone a Mumbai sense. It was just that everyone was standing next to the door and frowning at being occasionally touched by the others fighting to get in.
Meanwhile, the centre of the carriage was only dotted with passengers. Our space has been one of our great assets here in WA.
It is what people come here for.
But we will have to learn to drop the quarter-acre fences in our minds if we want to enjoy the benefits of living in a medium-sized city.
We may just have to learn to cope with rubbing shoulders on the train, with people squeezing past us in crowds and with making do when people are moved to dance at concerts.
As for your second question, yes I think it is wonderful that you are still cycling but no, I wouldn’t recommend the red bike shorts.
