Domenica Calarco is well known as a reality TV star from the 2022 season of Married At First Sight Australia. Dom's been through it all and as Yahoo Lifestyle's sex columnist she is sharing her big sister advice about all the taboo topics you wish you could ask about – and nothing is off limits.
Question: I'm newly single and want to have regular sex, but fear my friends will judge me. How much sex is 'normal' and how do I get them off my back?
As a fellow single gal, let me just start by saying: I hear you!!!
I vividly remember the moment after my recent breakup when it dawned on me that regular sex would now be a thing of the past. My collection of sex toys might tide me over, but that human connection and physical touch is something every single gal will feel from time to time.
'There is no normal'
When it comes to sex, I don’t think the word ‘normal’ should be used at all. There is no normal. We are all different in every single aspect of our lives.
You’re never going to meet someone in life that has the exact same sexual desires at the exact same times as you do. I very publicly proclaimed to have a higher sex drive than my MAFS husband Jack, and received a lot of hate for talking about my sexual desire… Mainly from old white men!
Judgment from your friendship group though is a whole other issue.
Some people aren’t as open to talking about their sex lives which in turn can make them seem as though they are judging you, which in fact they are just trying to deflect from the conversation.
'Casual safe sex is an amazing thing'
This is me giving them the benefit of the doubt, because to my core, if anyone - be that friends or family - were going to judge you for anything you do in life - whether that is sex, a new job or buying that handbag - it isn’t healthy!
And you shouldn't just ‘allow’ it to happen because that person is someone you call a friend.
You’re single, and casual safe sex is an amazing thing. You aren’t just normal, you are amazing.
Go out and have that great sex you deserve!
Listen to Dom's podcast Sit With Us with Ella Ding wherever you get your podcasts.
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