Advertisement

Yes, Steve Ballmer actually said 'toilets, toilets, toilets'

Only developers have known more affection.

Wally Skalij/Los Angeles Times via Getty Images

What has Steve Ballmer excited now that he can't channel his boundless enthusiasm into Windows developers? Lavatories, apparently. As ZDNet notes, the former Microsoft chief (and now LA Clippers owner) told The Washington Post and others that he has been obsessed with toilets at the Clippers' upcoming stadium, the Intuit Dome. And yes, Ballmer declared "toilets, toilets, toilets" — when he repeats a word multiple times, you know he's serious.

This doesn't mean the toilets are about to run Windows or flush water in Microsoft colors. Rather, it's that the Intuit Dome will have an NBA-leading ratio of toilets (one for every 27 seats in the upper deck). Ballmer hates waiting in line for the washroom at a sports arena, and that high ratio will make sure you spend more watching the game than doing your business.

It won't surprise you to hear the Clippers used technology to solve that problem, however. The team used a computer model to estimate how long it would take a fan to use the washroom, grab food and return to their seat. That high toilet-to-fan ratio should help you get back in the space of a typical NBA timeout. Don't laugh too loudly about Ballmer's toilet fixation, then, as you might just appreciate it when nature calls in the middle of a playoff game.