Calpernia Addams: American actress and transgender activist on changing discriminatory hearts and minds from military to Hollywood

American actress and transgender activist Calpernia Addams is a woman of many talents who has fought for justice on many levels. Born male, she served as a specialist combat medic with the US Navy and Marines before beginning her sex transition.

She is in Australia for the first time as part of the Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras festival, culminating in this weekend's parade.

Addams' act, which includes song, dance and a variety of musical instruments, has been described as "Elvira-meets-Joan Jett".

But her looks are Marilyn-meets-Mae West, with styled blonde hair swept over glittering costume jewellery and a perfectly made-up face.

Although she is no stranger to cruelty and rejection, her aim is to "stay sweet no matter how sour life gets".

Suffering from gender dysphoria from a young age, Addams felt that she should have been born female instead of male.

But the entertainer learned early in life that expressing herself resulted in punishment.

Born in Nashville, Tennessee, her parents were Christian fundamentalists.

She likens the church to a cult.

"We weren't allowed to see modern movies, listen to modern music. Women were not allowed to wear make-up or colour their hair," she told Jane Hutcheon on One Plus One.

"Wearing gold was vanity, so my parents did not wear wedding rings.

"It was just a strange way to grow up."

Discouraged from college because her parents believed "education led one away from God", Addams later joined the Navy.

She served in Al-Jubail, Saudi Arabia during Operation Desert Storm as a specialist medic taking care of sailors, marines and prisoners of war.

After her service, Addams went to her first drag show where she saw glamorous performers on stage who turned out to be transsexual women.

"I was gobsmacked, I thought 'wow it's possible', if they can do it then why can't I?" Addams said.

She began her sex transition in her 20s, which ended in sexual reassignment.

Lover beaten to death in his sleep

Addams recalls meeting soldier Barry Winchell one fateful Sunday while working as a showgirl after she had transitioned.

"It is so difficult to find love as a trans woman because we are so often fetishised. A lot of the earliest media portrayals of trans women are either in pornography, or they are always portrayed as prostitutes, psychopaths, and punch lines in the movies," she said.

"Barry Winchell was a heterosexual man — he'd only ever dated women, so of course I had worries. You know, 'am I woman enough for him' ... he sat me at ease quickly.

"We went out to coffee, I'd scrubbed off all my show make-up. I just had hair in a ponytail and a clean face and jeans and a t-shirt and he accepted me and flirted with me a treated me like a lady and it was very exciting because one is so insecure in those early days."

Yet their relationship was not without challenges, with Mr Winchell harassed by fellow soldiers for dating Addams.

After being together for about a year, on the night Addams was competing in a pageant, soldiers beat Mr Winchell to death while he slept.

An emotional Addams says her heart is still broken 15 years after the incident.

Mr Winchell's death became the subject of a film in 2003, Soldier's Girl.

The murder also resulted in a formal review and subsequent end to the US's "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy – in which gay and lesbian Americans could remain in the military if they did not openly declare their sexual orientation.

"We have changed the laws now but we still have to change the hearts of everyone involved," Addams said.

"Because as we know we can outlaw discrimination but it can still happen underground. So we have more battles to fight."

She has taken that fight to Hollywood, where she is an actress, producer and director.

Addams wants to fill the gaps about trans people, who are often represented as two-dimensional caricatures in various media.

In 2002 Addams formed Deep Stealth productions with fellow activist Andrea James in Los Angeles, which produces media with an awareness of trans women's contributions.

"I think a lot of minorities in Hollywood go through phases where in the earliest phases they're demonised and then they sort of become clown characters, and then they become tragedies, like 'oh that poor thing', and then they become the amusing sidekick and then finally they become a fully realised human character," Addams said.

"And we've seen that with trans people."

She has worked with Felicity Huffman for her Academy-award nominated performance as a transgender woman in Transamerica as well as Jared Leto in preparation for his Oscar-winning role in Dallas Buyers Club.

"We need the brilliant minds to work in the halls of power ... but we also need the artists and the personalities and the human faces to reach out through media, film, television, music," she said.

"And that's my talent I hope ... to show people we're not scary and we're not perverts … we just want to participate in society."

There is not a hint of bitterness in Addams, whose resilience, humour and compassion are all the greater for her life experience — making the world a sweeter place for many.

• _For the full interview with Jane Hutcheon watch One Plus One at 10:00am today on ABC, or on the One Plus One website._*