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Grieving mother of Thomas and Stuart Kelly reveals her biggest regret

A grieving mother has revealed her deepest parental regret after enduring the pain of losing one son to homicide and another to suicide.

Stuart and Thomas Kelly’s parents, Kathy and Ralph, shared their heartbreaking story in an episode of Andrew Denton’s Interview on Channel 7 on Tuesday night.

Mrs Kelly detailed the night her youngest son, Stuart, called them in panic, asking to be picked up urgently after spending his first night at a Sydney university college.

His older brother, Thomas, had been killed in a one-punch attack four years earlier.

In the two months that followed Stuart’s anxious phone call, Mrs Kelly said her son barely emerged from his room in the family’s Northern Beaches home, and refused to go back to university.

Parents Kathy and Ralph Kelly discussed their heartbreak after losing one son to homicide and another to suicide.
Kathy and Ralph Kelly appeared on Andrew Denton's Interview Tuesday night to share their heartbreaking story. Source: Channel 7
Heartbroken mother Kathy Kelly explains having regrets about her behaviour prior to her son's suicide.
Mrs Kelly explained she had deep feelings of regret with how she reacted to her son's desire to reconsider his career. Source: Channel 7

She said he told them they were “never going to know” details about the night they picked him up, and had expressed a desire to reconsider his career.

“He also did a complete turnabout about what he wanted to do with his life. He had made a beautiful rocking chair for the HSC and he said, ‘oh, maybe I’ll just go do some woodwork’,” Mrs Kelly told the host.

He took his life in July 2016, aged 18 – the age Thomas was when he was killed in the unprovoked attack during a night out in Kings Cross.

Mrs Kelly has since struggled with the thought she could have done more to save her son’s life, worried she said the wrong things and didn’t listen to what he told her.

Brothers Stuart and Thomas Kelly both died aged 18 four years apart.
Stuart (left) took his life in 2016, four years after his brother, Thomas (right), was killed in a one-punch attack in Kings Cross. Source: AAP

“I said all the wrong things like, ‘oh, we didn’t struggle to send you through this school to have you turning timber.’

“And I could kick myself now, because I would — I wouldn’t care what state he was in, if he was in that bedroom I’d be happier than anything, I wouldn’t care what he wanted to do with his life... I just wanted him to be here.”

Readers seeking support or information on suicide prevention can contact Beyond Blue on 1300 22 4636, Lifeline on 13 11 14 or Suicide Call Back Service on 1300 659 467.

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