It's unfortunately a part of life to experience romantic relationships that end up not being right for you. We've all been there — including myself. I came across this very relatable question asked on Reddit, "What happened in your relationship that made you realize you deserved better?" and the thread was filled with honest answers from women. Here are some of them.
1."Might sound shallow but I didn’t get a Valentine’s Day gift or any special treatment at all. It wasn’t so much that I didn’t get a thing — it was that this man would never put in any effort to make me happy. So I was out the next day."
2."With my ex, I had to give an ultimatum just to have him do basic things in the relationship like, walk dogs with me without it turning into a screaming match, help with household chores, etc. I had to convince him to try and do things with me, including prioritizing sex."
3."He kept conveniently forgetting anything I asked or reminded him of."
4."I knew when it was magically my fault that he was malnourished because I was too tired to cook, even though I was studying full-time and he was home all day without any work or studies whatsoever."
5."After an argument, he ghosted me for two weeks for the second time after I told him I wasn't tolerating this behavior anymore."
6."My ex uninvited me from our family vacation and took his mother instead. He didn't call or message me the whole time, not even a check-in about our kids. I asked for a divorce the following week and he's still shocked as to why."
7."My ex only wanted to see me twice a week. We lived 15 min from each other, he owned his own house and it was always very calculated. He said running errands as a couple was yucky and any deviation from normal routine freaked him out. Dumped his ass."
8."My ex of eight years couldn't step up when I found out I'd struggle to have kids. I remember the pain of it to this day. He was a wonderful partner, my best friend, there was no one I cared about or loved more in this world but realizing I was carrying this alone was a deal breaker for me."
"I couldn't look at him the same knowing how lonely, and empty, he made me feel in those first few weeks. He didn't have any suggestions, or any initiative to take the lead and let me process the news. I was trying to convince him to step up, give me his thoughts on the situation, and tell me what he wanted when I was trying to process what I wanted from all this and what I'd lost.
I realized in those moments I deserved better. If I was carrying this weight alone with someone I'd dedicated this many years of my life to, I might as well be alone until I found someone who would carry it with me and know what they wanted so I could tell them if my medical issues will be an issue for their future goals with family making, etc.
We are still friends, and I'll probably always love him. But I know that I'd be happier doing this alone or deserve someone who can support me with it."