Opinion
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The Juggling Act: The apparent hilarity of nose picking, breaking wind and other gross stuff.
Sally EelesBefore I delve into this week’s blog, I feel it necessary to warn anyone with a weak constitution to turn back now.If the thought of bodily functions displeases you, or makes your stomach churn, then this is not for you.And so I begin.Not so long ag...
July 24, 1:16 pm -
Keeping it clean in a woman’s world. Why men don’t get spotless.
David SalmonIt’s a scientific fact that men have no idea how to clean.Sure, we pretend to know what we’re doing. But deep down, there’s an admission to be made. We have absolutely no ability in anything that involves making a room look sharper.There may be a fe...
July 24, 12:23 pm -
Get that missile off my roof - this isn't Beijing!
James CheyneThere's some amazing Olympics related facts and figures flying about as we thrust toward the opening ceremony. Four billion TV viewers, 20 thousand journalists, 10 thousand athletes …. five thousand cups of pee – just some of the numbers spruiked b...
July 19, 5:14 pm -
Places you shouldn’t fall asleep #12 – A friend’s toilet.
David SalmonI woke to various degrees of pain. In different spots.Some was to be expected. The headache, for instance, was easy to explain.The 50th birthday party the night before had been a howling success. Much love and laughter for the Birthday Girl. And the...
July 17, 11:44 am -
Clucking with the chooks
Melody HorrillEarlier this week I flew to Tarlee, north of Adelaide, to visit a free range egg farm for a story about the definition of free range.Being a huge supporter of free range produce, I was very excited to visit a farm accredited by the RSPCA, and to see...
July 13, 5:09 pm -
THE JUGGLING ACT – The fence
Sally EelesI’ve just fertilized the back garden with little pellets of blood and bone. It’s supposedly organic.Apparently it’s tasty too, if the actions of the neighbour’s dogs account for anything.As I write, I notice a little, white, ball of fluff (AKA the m...
July 11, 11:25 am -
Father v Trampoline. Another backyard nightmare. And how The Teenager saved the day.
David SalmonI sat, and stared at the parts set out before me. In the hope that through some sort of backyard miracle, they would assemble themselves.They didn’t, of course. The bits and pieces refused to assist.The company responsible had given assurances that ...
July 10, 11:17 am -
Oi! Aussie! It’s time for a new chant
Michael Coombes“Aussie, Aussie, Aussie. Oi, Oi, Oi.”Seriously, is that the best we’ve got?This proud nation of talented people has produced a solitary war cry.We’ve managed to stretch one word and a grunt into a nine syllable chant that’s supposed to magically ins...
July 6, 10:24 am -
It’s great to be a Queenslander. Especially if you were born in NSW.
David SalmonBlame Matty Bowen. It’s all his fault. If he hadn’t been so bloody quick, I might never have come clean.Origin One, 2005. One of the all-time great encounters. At Queensland’s home of rugby league.Scores locked at fulltime. Both teams spent. Fans ho...
July 3, 1:05 pm -
A Win/Win for Abbott
Alex HartMake no mistake, the Malaysia people swap deal is a dog. There is a reason why the High Court found it to be illegal. In Malaysia, asylum seekers are treated worse than second-class citizens. They are routinely detained, and caned. On human rights g...
June 27, 11:12 am -
The new way to impress girls and become a star. Be a goose on YouTube.
David SalmonNot that long ago, you needed special talents to be a showbiz celebrity.Elvis. Sinatra. The Beatles. Madonna.Youngsters didn’t get a look in. Unless you were Shirley Temple or Rin Tin Tin.How times have changed. In our instant world of social media,...
June 26, 12:23 pm -
The JUGGLING ACT: The Urge to Purge
Sally EelesThere’s nothing quite like a good purge.The process of diving into a disorderly cupboard, gathering up accumulated junk and tossing it out.Quite frankly, it soothes the soul.Well it soothes mine at least. And probably everyone else’s in the househol...
June 26, 12:00 am -
What US history can teach us about gay marriage
James CheyneWhen Barack Obama finally expressed his support for gay marriage last month he sent issue waves pulsating around the world. OK, his words won't change any US laws, nor win/lose him too many presidential votes - but they were a global energiser to th...
June 21, 9:48 am -
Rodeo Drive cheaper than Queen Street Mall
Michael CoombesWhen was the last time you drove in to the city?If you’re anything like me you avoid it as best you can.It’s not just the traffic on the way in, it’s the cost when you get there.In Brisbane, an hour on the side of the road will set you back $4.20. I...
June 21, 12:00 am -
Why kids know everything and parents know nothing. Lessons on how to let them find their way
David SalmonIt’s hard for a child to accept that parents may have actually achieved something in a former life.There is no possible way any of us could have had ability of any sort, way back then.It’s all so different now. And we don’t get it.As much as they lo...
June 19, 12:00 am -
Message to pollies: Think about what’s best for your family when it comes to gay marriage, and say yes.
Sean BerryMP Joe Hockey says that once he had children, his position on gay marriage shifted against it.Having kids of my own set my position in stone too, but in stark contrast to Mr Hockey’s stance.On a recent fiery Q&A program he said that first-hand exper...
June 19, 12:00 am -
Parents who cheer the cheerleaders. How we're all caught up in the sport of the future.
David SalmonIt takes a special woman to get away with wearing a huge pink hair bow.If the lady in question is, shall we say, of an age, then it’s an even greater challenge.Our compere at the World Cup Cheer tournament cared nought about such observations.She wa...
June 15, 12:00 am -
The JUGGLING ACT: Babyish
Sally EelesThe three-wheeler Shrek scooter stands idle in the garage.It’s missing a bit of paint and has some rust. The tyres are well worn.It used to be a favourite. Went everywhere. Rain, hail or shine. To kindy, school, the park, the beach.It originally bel...
June 15, 12:00 am -
The Eyes have it. Or not. Why does getting old mean I can’t read the menu?
David SalmonNot that long ago, I could see all. Perfect vision. Unlike George Costanza, I was spotting letter boxes, not raccoons.At my age, this was a rare thing. My friends were all needing help. In restaurants, and at work. Someone was dimming their lights.I...
May 29, 12:00 am -
The JUGGLING ACT: Grime Free
Sally EelesI am pleased to report that I now leave the house with clean clothes.Well, sometimes there might be a tiny drop of sunscreen or a splatter of toothpaste… but I’m relatively grime-free.And this I feel is cause for celebration.A milestone if you will....
May 29, 12:00 am
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